It’s All About The Money

Remember those days when you were studying in school, trying to achieve high scores in exams and in some cases, trying to pass a course in university? I remember frequently wishing that I could graduate school STAT! No more school, no more exams, no more 3 hour evening lectures. Those 4 years felt like forever when I was studying, but looking back, it all went by too fast. Now, there are bills to pay, goals to pursue, ever increasing workload with a stagnant pay, or salary that doesn’t increase as fast as inflation (Hint: Property prices in Penang, etc. etc. etc..)

In my quest to get a property, I find that it’s close to impossible to get something that I like. When the downpayment is affordable, the property is too far away and less desirable since it’s located right in the industrial zone. When the area is desirable, the price is too high. When you qualify for the loan, there’s not enough cash for the downpayment and of course the legal fees, stamp duty etc…

When I think about all this, I just long for my eternal home. At least I don’t have to worry about down payments, bank loan and furnishing costs…

John 14: 3 If I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself, that where I am,there you may be also.

Don’t Ask Me To Make Lemonade

Lately it feels as if there’s a tennis ball throwing machine in front of me and I’m running all over trying to avoid being hit. No, don’t ask me to make lemonade from the lemons thrown at me. When will it finally be my day. ?

Wasn’t it less than 2 years ago when someone’s pregnancy took precedence over my knee injuries. Back then, her justification to management was that she wasn’t able to do too much walking and the paperwork involved (getting approval signatures etc) required quite a bit of walking. So my portfolio increased. Then again, as I recall, she did quite a bit of shopping during her pregnancy. Didn’t that involve walking a lot in the mall?

And now, even my long awaited holiday may need to be postponed because I may need to be her backfill?

Ah Lord God! Now would be a good time to save me…

 

Have You Been Tai Chi-ed?

One moment you’re happily managing your existing workload. The next moment, you get called and informed that your portion has increased and someone else’s has decreased. Apparently he/she has no time and is having a hairball of a time handling something that was recently transferred to him/her. (For simplicity’s sake, I’ll use “him/he” as reference.) Oh but wait a minute, you’ve always seen him coming in late in the morning and coming back from lunch late. Guess what! There’s also an extended water-cooler time where he meets with other guys to find out what’ happening…a.k.a gossip. You’ve been tai-chi-ed. Someone has “pushed” his/her workload to you.

This happened to me today. Just as it happened to me a year and a half ago, by the same person. I’d be a complete liar if I say that I wasn’t mad at all. Wasn’t it just this morning when I read the morning devotion about trusting (and obeying) God? Oswald Chambers wrote the following, “Faith is deliberate confidence in the character of God whose ways you may not understand at the time.” Applying it is definitely tough.

I need to remind myself that God is not blind about the unfairness. While I definitely do not understand how He is working through this, I will just need to surrender.  Obedience must follow trust.

Jeremiah 29:11

New International Version (NIV)

11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

 

My Helper

The reading from Psalm 18 brought tears into my eyes. During the earlier years of my working life, I was employed in a very small company that brought me nothing but misery. (Don’t go looking for the name of this company in my profile at LinkedIn because it isn’t stated there.) There were no more than 4 people, including myself. The actual job wasn’t what I had expected, but still I pressed on although I felt that I was wrongly treated. When the senior manager visited, I felt obliged to join them at a dinner followed by a karaoke session at the smoky pub. Things grew unbearable when they gave me less tasks to do and I was very bored and my desk was shifted closer and closer to the restroom. It felt sickening and demoralizing. I sank into depression and questioned God why He allowed it to happen. It was as if they wanted me to be so uncomfortable that I would leave on my own instead of paying compensation. Hardly anyone talked to me. I was the only female employee. Lunch was terribly weird as we all went out together hardly speaking a word. Nothing changed except I continued feeling more and more uncomfortable and I caved in and threw my love letter. In less than one month, I secured another job in a multinational company. Today, I can honestly say that if they had meant it for evil, God used it for good. I’m not sharing this to bad mouth them but as a testimony of God’s goodness in providing the way out for us.

Today I realize more and more, what an awesome God I serve. He truly is my faithful helper.

Psalm  18:16 He reached down from heaven and rescued me; he drew me out of deep waters. (NLV)