That Awkward Feeling

Oh that awkward feeling —

Sometimes you meet someone whom you feel like you’ve known for ages. Then you wonder why you didn’t meet that someone years ago. But then, years ago, things might have been different. Then you wonder why you feel somehow drawn to him. Maybe not in a romantic way but you like this person anyway. For some reason, you’re able to sense that he has a deep pain hidden behind his smile. And you wish – deep down in your heart that you can dive in his heart and somehow remove whatever that’s causing such pain and let him really smile again.


Two Months

I had meant to write this a week ago but was tied up with other things, plus still recovering from a cold.

In one of our lunch, someone said something about a colleague of mine whom I hardly deal with but we were in the same team. Not many people knew that she’s battling cancer and her battle is coming to an end ~ unfortunately she’s on the losing side.

So, the question someone said was “What would you do, if you’re told that you have 2 months left to live?” I said I’d do what’s important to me with the time I have left. Someone else said she would spend more time with her family. The other reply was “But you don’t know if your family members will have time. You may be at home while others are working.” That could be true, but I think when that actually happens, the family members will want to spend time at home too.

I’m still finding it hard to believe that she has 2 months left although I’m not that close to her. But the truth is, we all have an expiration date. With each day that goes by, that time gets shorter and shorter.

So, what would you do with your remaining time? Lost time is lost. Forever.


Just Daydreaming

There’s one festivity and two days that I don’t like in every year. Chinese New Year, Valentine’s Day and Chinese Valentine’s Day.

Chinese New Year – because there was a time when relatives who visit would keep asking when it would be my turn to get married (as if one is born in life to grow up, work, get married, have children and die). But this is getting better since most of our regular visitors reside in another country.

Valentine’s Day – because I often wonder why there is a need to shower one’s girlfriend/lover/wife with roses/chocolates etc on Valentine’s Day at the office. I guess I’m just the kind of person that feels that my significant other (if there’s ever going to be one) will only need me to know his true feelings; and not my entire office.

Chinese Valentine’s Day – again – perhaps it’s just me. But everything is just so commercialized. So much so that the message I seem to see is “tell them you love them only on Valentine’s Day”.  And so, restaurants and cafes use take the opportunity to hike up the prices for lovebirds etc…

So, remember to treasure your loved ones daily (not only on Valentine’s Day).

If you’re single, go out and celebrate you! You are special and Designer-made. God made only one you and not clones. Celebrate that. If you’re the hopeless romantic, I hope you have the best back hug from the one you love (understand that sometimes it’s one sided, so this can be a miracle or a wishful thought).

And for those whose heart longs for that one person (who doesn’t know he/she exists)…. it’s ok to not feel ok at times and feel sad while you’re waiting. However, go out there and celebrate you. Go out there and eat at a good restaurant, enjoy a good movie or spa… and trust in God that He knows the best.


In The Storm

Last October, I received a prophetic word about being in a storm and the verse given to me was Hebrews 10:35-36.

Hebrews 10:35-36 New King James Version (NKJV)

35 Therefore do not cast away your confidence, which has great reward. 36 For you have need of endurance, so that after you have done the will of God, you may receive the promise:

I didn’t think much about it and shelved it. Then early in November, there was a word for me. “Be strong and of good courage.”  It didn’t dawn on me that those 2 verses were God’s way of preparing me of what was coming, and has now come. After all, 2016 was a good year for me.

Just as 2016 was ending, an announcement made me realize that I was entering into the storm. I prayed that I would be spared but for some reason, I knew that this was a path I had to go through. The earlier prophetic word included this statement, “Do not fear that storm you’re in for I am assuring you now that you will come through! Do not backup and go another way! Your path of prosperity is through this storm.”

A friend told me that she felt alone as it’s the first time she and I are in different teams. While I was trying to encourage her, I said I’m alone too. At least that was what it feels like lately, having no ally and nobody you really trust. I had purposed in my heart not to complain but then again, it’s especially difficult this year.

I found myself asking God if the lesson I’m supposed to learn in this period of isolation is that He is always with me, even though I can’t see it and definitely don’t feel it. Is He teaching me to depend fully on Him because who else do I have, but God? Is it possible to speed up these lessons?

But He whispered to me to trust in Him and I simply have to trust in Him. I need to remind myself that like how it was with Joseph, because the LORD is with me, I will be successful. (Genesis 39:2) Because God is my ally, who can be against me? (Romans 8:31)



Awaiting 2017

I don’t have much to write, except my prayer that the coming year will bring you to a closer walk with God.

I believe I have a destiny and every day I am closer my destiny. Praise God.

Psalm 37:23-24 The Message (MSG)

23-24 Stalwart walks in step with God;
    his path blazed by God, he’s happy.
If he stumbles, he’s not down for long;
    God has a grip on his hand.

Reflections on Christmas Day

It’s not so much because of the date because we can celebrate Christmas day, every day of our lives.

John 3:16 New International Version (NIV)

16 For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.

Because Jesus took away my sins, I can have a brand new start. Just like a blank art paper, I yield my life to the Master Artist to paint over my life.